The Parable About Giving

Why do guys send women drinks? I never really got that. Is it because guys think their chances at hooking up with one of them increase the more the women drink? If so, and women know this, why do they accept the drinks...just because it’s free?

If that is the case, then what I would suggest is for guys to just go around offering girls drinks; not just at clubs, bars, or restaurants, but all the time: while walking your dogs, at work, or at the gym; since they’re free women will accept them.

Or are guys just trying to show off how much money they have, that they can send this lady who may or may not be interested, this overpriced alcoholic beverage? Then the most important question, are women really impressed by that?

Personally, I think it takes more for a broke guy to offer a girl a drink. Think about it, instead of buying himself a drink, he buys one for you. That’s sacrifice. Sacrifice is an attribute of love. So you can enjoy that drink and have a good time, he won’t be able to get the whopper value meal from Burger King; he’ll have to settle for a whopper Jr. with no fries or soda, so you can enjoy that Appletini.

I’m pretty sure I remember reading something like that in the Bible. I don’t remember exactly how it goes, but concept is still the same. The Pharisees were buying Jesus all these expensive drinks like Cristal and Margaritas with Patron, but Jesus wasn’t impressed, because they had much and what they offered him was so little.

But the poor widow brought Jesus a half shot of Sauza tequila, because it was all she could afford, and Jesus was much impressed by this so he took her home for some miraculous loving like only the Son of God could, and he showed her the mysteries of the Kingdom. He showed her...all over her face.

Don’t quote me on that, I might have a few of the facts mixed up, but I believe the moral of that parable was to practice safe sex. Because, if Jesus can get Herpes, then anyone can get Herpes. And there’s no cure for Herpes. That’s right, even Jesus can’t cure Herpes.